Friday, October 17, 2008

McCain Apologizes to David Letterman: Transcript, Video (10-16-08)

Read the complete transcript. See the video.

David Letterman: Our first guest is currently serving his fourth senatorial term and is the Republican nominee for the President of the United States. Please welcome, your senator from the great state of Arizona, John McCain. Senator.

Nice to see you John. Thanks so much for being here.

John McCain: Thank you for the bus tour. And that little trip down memory lane there.

DL: Can you stay?

JM: Depends on how bad it gets. I have a son in the Marine Corps and I asked him to Fed Ex me his helmet and flack jacket. But it didn't get here in time.

DL: I think you'll be alright. Now what exactly happened? I thought I was doing my part to save the economy…and then later I got to think, well maybe I'm just not important enough.

JM: Can I give you an answer?

DL: Please.

JM: I screwed up. But look at all the conversation I gave you.

DL: Yes, it really was fun.

JM: Including having a Mr. Olbermann on.

DL: You know, John, you called me –

JM: I haven't had so much fun since my last interrogation.

DL: You called me an hour and a half and said, “We've gotta get right back to Washington.” But you didn't go right back to Washington.

JM: I screwed up. What can I say? What can I say? It's been reviewed pretty well, what happened.

DL: You had a meeting – you probably had a meeting and everyone said, “It's just Dave.” We don't care.

JM: Yeah, “It's only Dave. There's only a few million who'll be watching. What the hell? Who cares?”

DL: Well, I'm willing to put this behind us.

JM: Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you. Thank you.

DL: And thank you for coming back. And if you are elected and you become the President of the United States, I wanna be –

JM: I'll be back. Secret Service and all.

DL: Oh good. But I'm not done. I want your friend Sarah Palin here. I'd like to have her here. And if you're in the White House, I want to be the guy who sits in the outer office reading magazines. “What? Yeah, go on in!”

JM: Is this a shakedown or a ransom?

DL: How about that debate last night? How do you think that went?

JM: I thought it went well and I think you were mentioning, the first time we were behind podiums, as I recall. Second time we were a town hall meeting. Third time sit-down. The next one we'd be lying down, I guess. That was the only…sort of a Roman kind of thing. I thought it was very good. Look, I admire and respect Senator Obama. I have said that on many, many occasions. And he's inspired America. We have stark differences. It's been a tough campaign and I'm sure the next 19 days will be even tougher. But think of all the material it gives you for the next 19 days. There's gonna be kind of a sad feeling around here when the election finally takes place.

DL: We're going off the air, John. Tell us about Joe the Plumber. You invoked Joe the Plumber, the guy from Ohio. What's the deal there?

JM: Well, I saw him on a clip on television and he said that he had a business -- he was a plumber, worked all his life. He wanted to buy the business and he didn't want to have his taxes increased if he did so. So I kind of related to him and…Joe the Plumber – Joe, if you're watching, I'm sorry. But from what I've read, and I have not talked to him, but from what I've read, he's taken it pretty well. He says everybody gets their fifteen minutes… But on a serious note for a moment, Americans are hurting right now. Americans are hurting right now. We know that. They can't stay in their homes. They've lost their jobs. The whole economic collapse – which is not their fault. They've been the victims of a drive-by shooting from Washington and Wall Street.

DL: In the case of Joe the Plumber, most small business – and I assume Joe the Plumber is in that category – they don't gross $250,000 a year. Is that about right?

JM: A lot of them do – small businesses who make more than $250,000 a year, provide employment to 16 million people. Half of all small business income, make over $250,000 and they would be taxed. Look, now is not the time to raise anybody's taxes except yours. And I guarantee you that when I'm president, I'll do it! My first executive order. Share the wealth. Share the wealth. Distribute the wealth. Let's do it. You don't work too hard.

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